That Guy

Never ever he let you down.
And, he was always there to hold you down.
Everytime you called him to tell what is going in and around you.
As the world around him takes a pause, He would just listen to you.
Yes, that guy.

That guy, raised with morals and values. 
Guy, who is man enough in his shoes.
You may feel disappointed sometimes in your life,
but he will be your strength, for him you are the life.
Courageous enough to fight wars for you, only to fall weak in the knees infront of you.

That guy, who probably will never say these things to you.
That guy will never get to tell you, what you are to him.
The guy who might have already
started to save money, for the house you dreamt for.
That guy who have a perfect job, to keep you both full.
He has already paid half the money for the car you would like to ride in, that too of your favorite color.
That guy who would stay up all the night, just to make sure you are fine. Because you called him crying over this guy.
This guy, with whom you party till dawn, and get bruised by him.
For he wanted things, which you were not ready for maybe.
This guy who would abuse you, and take control of your life. 
Give you names and defame you.
Still deserves, your attention rather than that guy.

That guy, who is calling you again and again, just to check if you are fine.
That guy who still doesn't expect anything from you but just you.
He will play guitar, sing a song to you.
Play music, and dance with you in the house to cheer you.
Will talk to you even if you have fallen asleep.
Put blanket on you, and will miss his arms around you. 
Will leave you breakfast in the morning with a note which says.
"I Am That Guy.".
And maybe he is still your " That Guy

The Black Magician : Halfway

They made so much noise around themselves while mocking at him, that they couldn't hear his silence. They laughed at his dark face, his lean body, his native place, his caste, his religion, basically everything he was, he was made fun off, and played by them.  Sometimes being the nice human, and being there for everyone at their worst times, doesn't work for you, especially if you are not one of the beautiful looking face on this face of earth, sometimes being from one particular part of the nation, makes it obvious for them that you cannot fit their league, sometimes, and i mean just sometimes having a dark color is a sign of you related to "black magic".
WOW!!

So, at this time of my life, i feel like giving a report to all those people, who were a part of this game for long or short time, that what all harm i have faced because of my dark color, my not so beefed up body, my being related to a particular state, caste, and religion.

Let me just start with my religion first, being a human first and Hindu later, i have an equal devotion in all the religion, still keeping a practice of reading the holy books of all religion, i have faced only one harm, that i am filled with a lot of humility, patience, discipline, love, respect, for every face of being on this earth. Such a harm it has been to me. Right?

Being related to a particular caste and state, made some  learned and respected (as i used to think about them), believe that i could do lack magic. What else could have been a bigger harm to me, than this?
Love, relationship, commitment was all reduced to one simple name in a compound way to Black Magic. So the only harm i have had in this case, was that a man and a woman who would be almost of my parents age, and have kids of their own just like mine, can assume and preach this kind of remarks for a boy who is a son to some another woman on the same face of this earth,  is  that yes i do magic, keeping people happy around you, and being a constant help to anybody and everybody, is not less than magic and as far as black magic is concerned then yes... i would say, working hard day and night to be a successful black son and good human being for my family, can be termed as black magic. I would take that as a compliment....!!

Being related to the eastern side of the nation, makes it very obvious for them, that i must be a bad human, a spoiled brat, narrow minded, shallow thoughts, no respect for others, living in a hut or something. I mean screw you people, i am intellectual, have a clarity of thoughts, mature, in constant discovery of myself, working my path to the top, through education, talent, and understanding human being , unlikely of what you think.


(To be completed soon.....)

The Hug of a Clown

A Hug, It had a lot of importance in my life once, but lately i have realized that the power a hug had, to make people stay with you, wasn't there any day. I thought may be one hug can solve all the chaos, but it never happened. A hug used to be an unspoken promise, that "I am there with you."

I admit the fact that I now don't believe in the conviction of hug. So I have stopped hugging the loved ones, because once i opened my eyes, and all they witnessed, an empty ring of arms and a blurred silhouette of them going away from me. I tried calling them back, asking for one more hug, thinking they would come back, but it didn't happen. As i have always been, i would never like the loved ones under any blame, so i take it all on me. They were nice, may be i didn't know how to keep them.

A hug have may have been an answer to all the question for two hearts which belongs so well, but now it's the question.

Maybe I would never ask anyone to stop and stay by me, not because i don't want to, but i know they won't come back. The hug would not work its magic.

Said The clown in his broken voice, because he choked while trying to put an end to his tears which he bleed in his smile everyday in front of his spectators of his circus.

Awake

Without you, i am living like, i am dying,
with every breath i take, i breathe death and exhale my soul.
I dont have you by my side, my hands don't have a head to rest now,
I am free to live in a suffocated room of dying memories
A dark room, where my tears are the oil to the lamp of my burning heart.

I stiill go to the holy place, i used to visit with you,
for wishing, only to be with you,
Now I go , to wish a visit with the death,
because the pond next to the holy place,/
where you used to pour the holy water of the pond
on my head with your beautiful hands,
Now I dont have that hand, and that water would never touch my
head again, I guess.

So may be its my time to say good bye to myself
Cause its been a long day and a forever long night for me
but i still have not been able to catch on sleep
I have forgot, what sleeping used to be like.
Its has been months, when i would have wake up to the morn/
because for waking up, it demands to sleep

Everything has started to fade away, my dreams, my smile, my tears, my breath
I dont knw, if i am can still find the reset button to all this or not,
But somewhere i know, even if i get that,
i wont be able to hit it, because then,
i might have to start all over again
i dont know if i would be able to start or not,
but i guess, it would end again, but maybe not like this,/
I would like to staay and witness that,
but i have been awake for quite a long time,
and my eyes filled with tears,scarrying a burden of sweat on the lids and
gravitational force of the earth also failed to bring my eyelids down,
and my eyes have started dying too.

I would like to write more, express more,/
but now suddenly i have started to feel,
my brain has become light wight and
my eyelids have gained some weight,
I guess the overdose of sleeping pills are working
The box of pills said right, it works when we don't
SO NOW i am goin...like,.... iiiiiiii    dnt know      where......
i will seE If I caNM comEw Back.

Sach toh sach hai

dheeme bolo ya bolo chahe zor se
sach toh sach hai
kadvi ho ya ho meethi
sach toh sach hai

jameen pe bolo ya dohrao aasman me
sach toh sach hai..
tera nahi mera nahi..
sach toh sach hai

likh k bolo ya chahe bolo gaa gaa ke..
sach toh sach hai..
sochne ki baat hai
sach toh sach hai..

smjho ya na samjho
apni suno ya dusre ki
khud ki karo ya karo dusre ki kahi
sach toh sach hai..

main bolu, tum bolo
main ladu, tum lado
bolu chahe na bolu
suno chahe na suno

jhooto ki duniya mein aj bhi woh zinda hai..
kyunki sach toh sach hai..
sach ki toh sirf ek hi baat hai
ke sach toh sach hai..

woh marta bhi toh kaise, rota bhi toh kyun
kehne ki jo baat hai,
uska yeh ek sach hai
uska sach toh sach hai.

kehna mera bhi galat ho sakta hai,
main bhi jhoota ho sakta hoon,
yeh jo sach ka naam main jap rha hoon
yeh bhi galat ho sakta hai..

phir bhi ek amar sach hai.
ki sach toh sach hai.

Reminder

Nrityansh and Geetanshi have been together, and all these time were good and there was a togetherness, when their ship of love got hit by iceberg of worldly measures.
A piece of conversation from that evening.
Nrityansh: I love you Geetanshi.
Geetanshi: Hmmm.... I am alright.
Nrityansh once again said : I love you Geetanshi.
Geetanshi kept her silence, didn't replied to him.
Nrityansh: I know you love me, but you won't say it. You might not be feeling well at this point of time, while you are taking a deep dive into your own thoughts. And don't worry I am not expecting a reply from you. "I love you Geetanshi" these words are not for you, they are for me. With all the troubles going around, i keep reminding myself, that I love you. My heart may feel low, when you don't reply saying "I love you Nrityansh", but thats alright. Everytime i speak my heart, i keep reminding myself, that I love you and I should not forget that I am fighting for us, and not just for you or myself.
I am going to say this a million times and even more, till the time death do us apart. But I just want you to remind yourself that you love me, because that would give you the strength to fight for us. That works for us. It have been and it will be always. I love you Geetanshi.

A letter to her father.

Hello Sir,

I hope you are fine, after all the stress you went through, which was never there in my to do list. I never wanted to hurt anybody in your family, by loving your daughter. Your daughter, what shall I say about her, you already know her for such a long time. But what I am going to say today, is about your daughter and me, together, because you didn't get to know us, and perhaps you don't even want to know about us.

But this is my attempt to save, all what I have got. I have known your daughter for a long time. We have been in a realtionship and invested a lot in this relationship to understand each other better than ourselves. We discuss our differences to maintain a balance relationship. I have always made sure, to stand with your daughter in all her good and bad times. I respect my mother a lot, cause my father always taught me to respect women. I have made sure that I follow those teachings dedicatedly. But there is something more important than this relationship between your daughter and me, that is our FRIENDSHIP. The strong and inseparable pillars of this relation between both of us.

I know you were always aware of the fact that I am one special friend of your daughter, because she would always bring my name into any discussion she had with you. She would always try to tell you that I am his more than a special friends. But I belive you couldn't read between the lines, or perhaps you avoided reading them.

I am from a different religious background, than yours. But being born in respective religions, is not a mistake either on my part or your daughters part. As soon as a baby is born, he is differentiated into religion, caste, class from one identity he carried with himself while arriving into this world, HUMAN. I would like you to know, that though i am born in different religion, i respect all the religions equally, i bow my head with equal devotion infornt of all the religious places. But just because I fell in love with your daughter, and want her to be with me, i went little ahead than my comfort zone, I have started reading the holy book of your religion. I pray to your master everyday to keep you all happy and give me strength to confront you all one day.

Now, having said that I would just like to add few more things to the list, which would be probably more important for you than these religious differences and all the other secondary parameters.
I love your daughter and I want to grow old with her. I want to spend my every single breath i breathe, onto her happiness. I want her to live a life of elegance, pride. I want her to live her life to the fullest. I want all of her dreams to come true. I WANT TO LOVE HER AND PROTECT HER TO AN EXTENT WHERE YOU WON'T EVER HAVE TO WORRY. I am sure you don't like to see her cry. I get tensed too when her tears fall. I can't see her hurt just like you can't. I know a father is a daughter's first love. I will always come second to you, and i am not jealous of the fact. But just in this healthy competition of being her first love, i have found her and mine happiness.

So, today i am writing this letter to you, to be your friend. Make me your friend, so you can help me out sometimes in keeping your daughter happy. I have this faith, once we would start knowing each other, we would be best of friends. My father is my best friend, and if we both also become good friends, i would be lucky enough to have the friendship of two fathers in one lifetime.

This is my attempt to be friends with you and your family. Give me one chance and i will prove to you that i will never be a heart ache.


Would be looking forward for your reply.

Regards,
Nrityansh